Sigh!!

Hmmmm.....hav been playing aroung with e html of my blog 4 e whole day n...errr...still not wat i want it 2 b....ARGH!!!!!!! e profile is on the wrong side, can't get a tagboard on, can't enter my own settings, background is still too plain.........AHHHHHH!!!! i'm gonna explode soon... thot tis was suppoese to destress me, but......it doing exactly e opposite..sigh!!!anyway, was suppose to go runnin n swimmin today, but...woke up late..hmmm...where's e discipline man... biathlon is coming up soon in 1 moths time, n i'm still so slack...i dunno wats going on...juz lacking e motivation 2 compete anymore. Mayb bcoz there no longer a team of people doing e same thing...mayb i need 2 find a partner whose capable of doing all tis together with me..hmmm..mayb mayb mayb.....realli miss e times last year trg with tim( The Bithlon Pai) come 2 think of it...those times were realli realli FUN haha=D....yesterday, mr see said he wants 2 signed me up 4 K1 500m n 1000m in e March race .....i was shocked..but muz admit, there was tt flicker of excitment for a moment, but it was over powered by confusion.....gues i was excited coz i'll get 2 indulge in tt air of arrogance which i've felt during all my pass races again...tt uncertainty at e starting line, tt confidence once e command sounds, tt feeling of burning lactic acid, tt sense of glee when other boats falls behind, tt sense od achievement upon crossin e finishing line, etc....2 add on 2 my pass glories..But....Am i prepared 2 race again...hav always thot tt i would 'retire' aft last season....was realli prepared 2 hang up my racing jersey, n give other sports a try....but now.....wat if it turns out bad?? wat if i cap?? wat if.....sigh!!!